Inspiration from X-Files and such

Maybe you didn't know I love to analyze movies and TV shows, in fact, I once almost entered into studying movies when I first graduated from university, not how to make movies, rather movie criticism. Didn't study that, because there was no such course in Hong Kong back then, and I didn't want to leave Hong Kong again after being absent for 5 years for university in Taiwan.

I love to watch several TV shows and am glad that no matter where I go, I am still able to get those shows.

I like X-Files, other than I like watching the rather handsome and smart Fox Mulder (David Duchovny) and his always skeptical partner Dana Scully (Gillian Anderson), I am intrigued by the fact that though Fox Mulder firmly believes that there is life other than those that exist on earth, he does not believe in God. On the other hand, Dana Scully, a medical doctor, who was sent to partner with Fox Mulder for the sole purpose of debunking his work, is highly skeptical of alien lifeform, but she wears a crucifix around her neck, and states that she believes in God and miracles. Isn't that funny what people 'choose' to believe? You might say, "When you see evidence, you believe." This is not quite the case. Dana Scully, through her line of work with Mulder, has seen a fair share of X-phenominum, however, she still told Mulder, "You have to show me evidence." She is always trying to explain things away with science. Hold on...she is the one who believes in miracles! And most people thinks miracles happen when science ends. On the other hand, Mulder, who is convinced that his sister was abducted by aliens, would always scorn Scully for her belief and having faith, yet, he is totally convinced of something he cannot prove yet. I think other than the X elements in X-files, the well-developed characters of Mulder and Scully contribute to the success of the series.

I also love forensic science, crime stories, criminal profiling, and shows along those lines. I am not particularly interested in the guts and blood, but I am fascinated by how criminals think, why they think they could commit crimes and not get caught. On the other hand, the dogged determination of the people who try everything they can to catch the criminal is worth every ounce of my respect, the process of solving crime fascinates me. What I learned from these shows is that the more arrogant you are, the easier you will get caught. A well planned out crime takes much longer to solve, versus if you think you are good, you will start to be careless, and eventually, you will get caught.

The shows about cold cases have taught me one thing further, judgment will always come, it might take detectives 20, 30 years to catch up with you, but you will get caught, there is always one thread of line that links back to you, awaiting for a detective to discover it, or an eyewitness to finally come forward. Of course, there are more unsolved cold cases than those that are solved, but each cold case that is solved gives hope, and hope is what you need when your loved one disappeared or murdered decades ago. With no hope or any reason to hope, the heart dies.

And of course, as a Christian, I do believe that there will be a final judgment, where all the cold cases will be solved, and God the great judge will sentence the criminals, who were allowed to be free on earth (physically but not in their conscience), to the eternal prison. And of course, we will also know if Mulder is right about aliens!

Two died today - 45 years ago

Two unique men died today 45 years ago, each unique in their own way.

C.S. Lewis and John F. Kennedy both died on November 22, 1963, both of Irish descent, both had tremendous influences to changing minds of this world.

JFK was assassinated, the world's attention was completely focused on JFK's assassination, C.S. Lewis' died suddenly and quietly.

What would they say to each other in eternity?

Finally

I finally start to type, what will happen next is an unknown. These thoughts have been on my mind for years, but unsure how I can put them into words, I let the them brew. Now, these thoughts cannot be contained anymore. In the recent months, for reasons only known only to God, friends and family started to tell me how good I wrote. As a literature major, I almost went into creative writing for my master's degree. Eventually, financial reasons forbidden me to do so. When I found blogging, there's where my urge to write can be satisfied, and in turn, people commented positively. This is my first attempt to my thoughts in a 'book', though I have been keeping track of many things for years in my head.

Scottish birthday

We would love to make a cake for Dan's birthday, however, without an electric beater, it is really hard. So we made Scottish scones instead. Kioni suggested we put a chunk of Toblerone on top of it to make it sweet, that what we did. We didn't have small candles either, so a big white candle stood beside of the 'cake' instead of in the cake. A mini heart shaped scone complete the birthday celebration. Then came the birthday song and warm hugs. I think Dan has a good birthday.

Mathematical broccoli

Kioni found this in the supermarket, she immediately calls it the pyramid broccoli. I at first didn't even think it was a vegetable, but then a saw that it was put together with a little head of cauliflower! It is a vegetable! How can that be, it just looks so...so...so...mathematical! And out of this world! Must have watched too much X-Files. Don't know if I would buy it a second time, it just look so different, maybe I will change my mind after I taste it. By the way, it has a name: Romanesco broccoli. It is was first documented in Italy (as broccolo romanesco) in the sixteenth century. It is sometimes called broccoflower and coral broccoli.

Brilliant mind

I am surprised how easily C.S. Lewis communicates with little minds, how brilliant it is to be able to pass over thoughts and emotions through simple words 45 years after he died! What kind of gift is that, to be able to write so many genre of literature and be so good at it! God truly bless some people with a brilliant mind, Lewis sure was one of them.

Kioni just finished reading The Magician's Nephew in the Chronicles of Narnia. She loves every single bit of it and asked to read the rest of the Chronicles. What a big mistake I made to leave my set of Chronicles of Narnia back in the U.S.! Well, I didn't think my 4 year old would be enjoying it that much, to tell the truth. So the best we can do for now is to show her the movie The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. Some scenes in the movie are a bit too scary for her, like the scene where Aslan was killed. Kioni doesn't like see the "ugly dudes."

Kioni not only loves the story, she even starts imagining her stuff toy animals coming alive and living in Narnia. She makes her pet sheep toy BaaBaa come alive, and the sheep bite the head of the White Witch off! I at first thought it is not possible that a sheep can bite a person's head off, and it is also too violent. When I was set to correct her, I was reminded that in fantasy land, everything is possible. And wars are always violent, so I let it go.

French Press

Due to lack of counter space, and mostly due to trying to save money on electricity and buying filtering paper for a coffee machine, I opted for using a French Press for my daily morning brew. It has been a wonderful surprise how great the coffee has turned out. I collected two French Press from my mom, well, she doesn't drink coffee, but she's got lots of gifts from friends, and two of them are French Presses. So I took them, knowing that they will be in use when I come to Aberdeen.

I just checked the internet, a regular French Press is not cheap! Am I glad that I have two. My old one broke while we were still in the U.S. I just prayed that these two will last me these years in Aberdeen.

我的父親

過去兩年多來多次整拾往時存下的物件，在一叠紙中發現了我在二十多年前，大學時代所寫的一篇文章。

寫於1986年6月19日 台灣大學

第一次看到爸爸滴眼淚，是在祖母的靈堂上。他並沒有哭，只是靜靜的 流淚。我們從小就聽他說祖母的偉大：祖母一個人領著七個小孩子從大陸逃難到香港，最大的才十七、八歲，爸爸是老四。從他平時的說話中，聽得出他懷念的故鄉 ﹣﹣ 那大房子和兒時嬉戲的庭園。祖母和兒女們在新界粉嶺賣飲料，叫「咖啡大王」，當時生活非常艱苦，是我們這幸福的一代體會不到的。可是有一點我是刻骨銘心的 看到了，就是爸爸的眼淚似乎在說：「樹欲靜而風不息，子欲養而親不在。」

爸爸很孝順老人家，我們小時候每週一次去探望住在伯父家的祖母，是必然的「節目」，我和弟妹有時候不想去，就會當場給他教訓一頓。爸爸會說沒有祖母就沒有 爸爸，沒有爸爸就沒有我們，所以我們一定要孝順祖母。另外，由於父母都要上班，我們姐弟三人都是由妹姨婆帶大的，從小到大，爸爸常常叮嚀我們一定要孝順姨 婆，沒有姨婆，我們不可能長得那麽壯健、活潑。孝慈觀念，就是從小時候潛移默化得來的。

爸爸因為限於環境，不可能受高深教育，他只唸到高中，可是他的領導才能令人驚訝。從賣票開始做起，在九龍巴士公司中，他今天已在外勤組管理數千部下。媽常說爸爸若多唸點書，成就必定驚人。他的深思熟慮和處理意外事件時的當機立斷，都不是平常我們心目中的爸爸所擁有的。他從來不會他看見的車禍的驚心動魄的場面向我們敍述，怕嚇倒我們，郤苦口婆心地提醒我們過馬路要千萬小心，不可亂衝亂撞。

爸爸帶給了我們最難忘的童年，海灘嬉水、砌沙堆；在名勝古蹟之間到處拍照；到大餐廳吃西餐。還記得他教我們怎樣拿刀叉、怎樣切牛排。記得有一次游泳後倦極 而歸，那時我們七、八歲吧！洗頭髮洗澡後就想睡，但頭髮仍未乾，爸爸就拿著毛巾幫我揉乾頭髮，另一隻手郤擋在我眼前，深怕燈光刺到我的眼睛。現在長大了， 才體會到那種是何等的慈愛，怪不得媽媽稱爸爸為「二十四孝爸爸」。我們對他的要求，除非是很不可能，否則他大多數都會滿足我們的心願。有時候甚至不用要 求，他會給我們一個意外的驚喜。

那時我才十二歲吧！爸爸知道我很喜歡小狗，有一天他如常的在晚上回家吃飯，那時我仍然在房間裏對著數學習題發呆。我只聽見咔的一聲，房門開了，爸爸一個箭 步衝進來，手中拿著一團毛茸茸的小毛球，往鋪滿了習題的桌子上一放，嘩！是一雙白毛小狗！當時我驚喜得話也說不出來了。爸爸就是這樣，幽默、風趣，且隨時 會弄得你手足無措。

有年好幾年農曆新年他剛好是當夜班，我們全家好夢方酣之際郤被吵醒了，聽得出來是由一個極不願意把別人吵醒的人所弄出來的聲音。爬下床來一看，原來是爸爸 抬著一支大桃花，他正把它那枝桃花抬到客廳中。他不管家中有沒有地方放這麽大一枝桃花，反正他看到又便宜又大又漂亮就買回來了。他不喜歡小的東西，因為他 的哲學是 ﹣﹣ 大就是美。因此家中無論買甚麽、養甚麽，都是以大為主。桌子、椅子、冰箱、電視機等都要大，養狗喜歡養德國狼犬。說到動物，一定要提這件事：弟弟在家中飼 養了用來做實驗竹的白老鼠。有一天，爸爸為了讓十多隻小白老鼠「舒展筋骨」，把牠們從籠子裏放到浴缸中跑步，白老鼠見有機可乘，就到處亂跑，搞得滿城風雨。

最為全家人傳頌至今的，是有一次他要買一套齊肩高的音響擴音器，但奈何房子太小，客廳放不下。但他說那對擴音器音質絕佳，不買實在太可惜了，所以他思前想後，終於給他想出了一個妙法，就是把因廚房太小而被推到客廳的冰箱搬回廚房，但是因為實在沒有位置了，所以爸爸說要把冰箱放在洗碗碟機上面！全家人一聽當場哄笑起來，洗碗碟機已有腰高，把冰箱放在上面，冰箱中的食物豈不是都要爬梯子才能拿得到了嗎？我們在笑聲中提出反對，爸爸郤說若這樣不行的話，就把洗碗碟機放在冰箱上又如何？這一說更非同小可，媽更笑得站不直腳。洗碗碟機放在高處，更本就不可能使用了。其實他也知道他的辦法是行不通的，只是他實在太想買那套擴音器了。他的幽默實在為全家帶來了不少歡樂氣氛。

除了買東西要以大為原則之外，他也吃得很多。所以從以前的「排骨祺」（排骨在廣州話為瘦的意思），變成了現在的「肥佬」。爸爸很喜歡吃飯，其他東西對他來 說都是「不頂肚」的（不夠飽）。就算媽精心泡製了數十隻上海餛飩給他吃，過了一會他仍是嚷著要吃飯才甘心。他自已吃得多，也要求我們吃得多。不止我們，就連他養的熱帶魚也如是。家中有一個五呎長橫放的水簇箱，其中魚口眾多，當然吃得也多，加上爸爸是雙倍餵飼的，所以魚兒都長得特快，顏色特別鮮艷，而且每尾都有營養過盛的傾向。爸爸最喜歡的一尾魚名叫「炮彈」，因為特別吃得多、長得胖、游得快，動作表情都比其他的魚都多，所以爸爸最疼牠。對魚兒尚且雙倍餵飼 了，你能想像他怎麼對待他寵愛有加妻子和兒女嗎？要是他煮麵給你吃，你跟他說你吃一個麵餅，他必定給你吃一個半麵餅。經驗告訴我們，以後我們想吃一個麵餅，就跟他說只吃半個，那麼他就會給你一個。可是後來這個「絕橋」給他看穿了，他仍是依然故我地煮一個半。皆因多年來不敢違背父命，因此全家都長得十分健碩。

對於我來台灣唸書一事，爸爸雖然非常贊成，郤是很依依不捨的。他很想我們多受教育，將來貢獻社會，他並且對子女們戴「四方帽」非常嚮往。近日看見學長學姐們和家人到處拍照，我已想像得到明年輪到我的時候，爸爸會笑得把眼睛瞇成一線，驕傲地撘著我的肩膀在校園拍照。今年妹妹在香港大學畢業，我想他更應老懷安慰了吧！媽曾對我說，在我離港到僑大的時候，爸爸老是長嗟短嘆。一來我是三姐弟中最有依賴性的一個，郤忽然離家而去，當然會傷心。二來兒女出國唸書對爸爸來說才是頭一遭，當然是不習慣女兒不在家。剛好那時正值英國進軍福克蘭羣島之際，爸爸就自我安慰地說：「英女皇尚且派她的兒子去戰場出生入死，我女兒只是去求學，又為何捨不得她呢！」那時才真正的體會到父親對我有多麽的疼愛。妹妹考香港大學的時候，面試後在等結果，爸爸的焦心和擔掛簡直就像自已申請入學 一樣。結果妹妹批淮入學了，從爸爸如何雀躍是不難想像的。

常常強調他是一家之主的他，其實是非常民主的。我們喜歡做的事，只要不 是非法勾當，他從來不會反對的。妹妹信基督教的初期他不大高興，因為怕她誤信邪教，後來也就小事化無了，連弟弟也信了呢！爸爸有一種說話方式很可愛，沒有和他共住的人常會誤會，我們稱之為「假民主」。當他說：「湯好像不夠味道，你們認為要加點鹽嗎？」的時候，不熟悉他的人可能會回答說夠味道了，不用加鹽 了。這就大大的誤解了他的意思，因為其實他是在說：「湯不夠味道，要加點鹽。」另外，去飲茶的時候他一直喊著叫弟弟叫一碗飯吃，又說弟弟肚子一定很餓，其實就是他自已肚子餓得發慌了。他這種說話方式為家中帶來了不少歡笑聲，因為我們很多時候會模仿他的說話方式，十分好玩。他又很喜歡一面吃飯，一面叫人挾菜挾肉：「嘉洛（我妹妹）吃魷魚啦！很新鮮的呀！」「迅立（我弟弟）吃這塊牛腩，很嫩的呢！」在飯桌上坐他兩旁的因此經常滿碗都是菜。自從我來了台 灣唸書之後，妹妹又在大學宿舍寄宿，家中就只剩下媽媽和弟弟，但是他吃飯的時候仍然會把我和妹妹的名字叫在口邊：「嘉洛不回來吃飯真笨，看這條魚多新 鮮！」

雖然爸爸吃很多，但是他也很注意運動，他常常會去跑步，時不時摸著肚子自鳴得意的說自已的大肚子不見了。有一次去館子吃飯時他要喝啤酒，媽媽勸他說喝啤酒會得大肚子，叫他不要喝了，可是他得意的說他已成功地減肥了，並摸著肚皮說：「你看我的大肚子沒有了！」說時遲那時快，館子的伙計拿著菜牌走過來問他： 「肥佬，看看吃甚麼菜！」

爸爸就是那麼慈愛、風趣、活潑和感情豐富的人，每次和家人說起他的趣事，總會笑得合不攏咀。他是我們家中的靈魂人物，他上班的時候，家中總是靜悄悄的， 只要他一回家，就一定有很多趣事發生。雖然我們再也不像以前那樣需要他帶我們到海灘游泳，到「爵士餐廳」吃西餐，到海運大廈的大空地上跑跑跳跳，這些地方，我們現在自已都會去了，但是我們仍要需要他的愛。事實上，他給我們的愛從來沒有停止過。只是人長大了，才能更深的體會到爸爸對我們的愛。

雖然爸爸從來沒有對我們說過「我愛你」這三個字，但他一直以來都以各種行動來表明他對我們的愛有多深。我們從未曾停止過感受他那真切的關懷和庇護。他對家庭的認真、負責、積極的態度，使全家都活在幸福裏。

基於中國人的含蓄，我從來沒有在他面前說過：「我愛你！」爸爸，請容我在這裏說一聲：「爸爸，我愛你！」